Saturday, June 11, 2005

The Dumbest Man Alive Wears Really Expensive Suits.

We had a pitch meeting today, to see if we can turn our short film into a TV series.

Our short is sort of a "Spinal Tap" type satire - one of those things that you either 'get' or don't 'get'.

This guy didn't get it. We were waiting for his partner to come out of another meeting, and he said - in response to my saying that Monty Python's "Fish Slapping Dance" was one of my favorite bits - "I just don't understand why you'd hit someone with a fish. Why would you have a fish? Does it take place in a fishmarket?"

That's when I knew we were fucked.

Sure enough, during the meeting they didn't get it and kept telling us that the actors were bad (they're not - they're actually amazing), and they just didn't think it was real (it's not supposed to.. oh, never mind).

This from a company who has a slate of reality shows such as "My Big Fat Mama's Bikini Wax", "Mall Night Watchman" and "Turtle Vets"*.

They did give us about an hour (which is unusual - normally if they don't like your idea, you get the bum's rush) telling us how we needed to re-edit in order to make it acceptable fodder to feed the machine - we smiled and nodded, and thanked them for the time they'd given us. The Blonde wants to do a recut to see if we can sell something.

Surprisingly enough, I agree. I'd rather sell out one idea so we can get some leverage -which will enable us to get a good show on the air at some point in the future.

I just don't want to sell to - or deal with - the dumbest man alive.

* These are not actual shows. To reveal this guy's production slate would be on a par with clubbing baby seals - so these are fake show titles that are about - intelligence wise - what he does have.


Dave2 said...

Not actual shows?!?

That's a pity, because there really should be a "My Big Fat Mama's Bikini Wax" on television... not because that's something I want to watch, but because NBC desperately needs a good lead-in for "The Biggest Loser."

Of course, I also think that "Britney Spear's Fish Slapping Hour" is a great idea for her follow-up to "Chaotic," so what do I know?

Peggy Archer said...

Ooooo... "Britney's Fish Slapping Hour".
I love it. It could be a variety show where she dances, sings, answers trivia questions and every once in a while whacks someone upside the head with a 15 lb. Sockeye salmon.

Wackiness ensues!

shamp said...

must be some smart turtles